Hair Today, Hair Tomorrow : a lady's crown

I still remember that one of the very first questions I asked my oncologist when he first laid out the "chemo-buffet" on all the side-effects that I should expect over the 5-6 month period, was .. "Doc, how will my hair look after the chemo, in say, 2 to 3 months time after the last treatment?"

I could see my hubby looking back at me instantly, as if in total wonder that such a question had even come into my mind when my very life was on the brink. I suppose expecting a man to understand what a woman's crown really means to her would be too much of a stretch. In truth, as he walked side by side through the first 5 months with me, I can sense that he began to understand what it means to me .. a little, perhaps.

So, given that my hair took such a huge chunk of my attention, from the start of chemo till this day, I thought it would be interesting for you ladies out there to have a glimpse of the hair-evolution I had to go through, pictorially. Here's 4 pictures I can share:

(Pic 1 : my long hair, before chemo)
Here's my silky long hair.. a real "Before" shot of what was crowning my head for a good 20 years. Aahh, the good ole days..




(Pic 2: my crew cut)
My hubby insisted that I should have this photo taken. I have never seen myself in this crew-cut short hair before, so it was a bit of a shock to the system. My hairdresser was excellent in snipping my hair to a level that I wanted. By now, the hair had begun to fall, and I didnt want the long hair to be dropping all over our home. Also, it helped in adjusting my own view of me before the next phase hits me, ie totally bald.

(Pic 3 : My wig)
Me and my wig, which became my constant companion for a good 5 months. The wig was made of natural hair, which I discovered was more comfortable than the artificial hair. Sometimes the heat generated under the wig can be rather unbeareable, which led to curious stares from the public whenever I took it out for some much needed airing in the car.. who cares what other people might think!

(Pic #4 : now)
And so, this is the answer to the original question above.. my hair 3 months after my last chemo. It's soft and it's curly.. my mum's description says it best : "like a young kitten's".
I certainly did not expect it to be this soft. I decided to give it a coppertone colour.. and it felt and looked good then.. still do now!


(Pic #5 of Kylie's hair)
When Kylie was interviewed in June, she had this to say about her hair:
"When it first started to fall out, I just buzz cut the whole thing. I am used to having different looks and figured out the way to use my scarf. But when it started to grow back, it was so thrilling!"

Yes, I know how she felt and can share that same sense of thrill with her.



>>gleefully ntangle

Top10 Stress Busters

Interestingly enough, as we talked about stress in the previous posting, an article popped up in the middle of clearing out some old documents yesterday. It is titled "Top 10 Stress Busters"..how appropriate indeed. I think you will find this listing useful, which is based on materials from IMH:

#1 : Exercise
You can walk, run, skip and do yoga or taiji but working your body is guaranteed to ease your mind. Exercise causes the brain to release endorphins, which are opium-like substances that ease pain and produce a sense of comfort and euphoria. People who exercise actually go to sleep faster, are more refreshed, have sharper memory, better reaction times and concentrate better than people who dont.

#2 : Take things step by step
Deal with changes one at a time as much as you can.

#3 : Organise your time - prioritise, and schedule for breaks
If you dont have priorities, you get bogged down trying to do everything at once. Try and rank each task in order of importance. It is the first step to feeling calmer about the many challenges that may come your way.

#4 : Break down your tasks
Tackle things step by step and give yourself enough time to complete them. This involves being realistic about the time needed to complete a project and scheduling some extra time in case things dont go according to plan.

#5 : Make your worrying count
Worry (if you have to) about things you can do something about.

#6 : Be realistic about your expectations
Know your abilities and limits. Ask for help when you need it. Accept that things do change.

#7 : Look inwards
Watch your thinking.. ask yourself if you are over-reacting. Are you looking at the facts of the situation or going with your feelings? What evidence is there to believe this thought? Is there another way of looking at this situation?

#8 : Make time for family and friends
Talk things out with them.

#9 : Wind down the day
At the end of the day, take some time to unwind. It could be having a warm bath or read a comic.

#10 : Learn to relax
Do deep breathing, muscle relaxation exercises, have a massage or visualise pleasant scenes.


Do these make sense to you? They do, to us. If you find that certain things you have been doing personally are very effective in reducing stress, please share it with us... post a short comment below, thanks!

>>gleefully ntangle

The Seed + Soil Theory

Kylie Minogue has it..
Sheryl Crow has it..
Heather Clarke had it..
Koh Chieng Mun has it..

My hubby's sis-in-law has it..
And now, my sister too has it..

What is happening to our society that is bringing this dreadful disease to the famous and the ordinary women folks like us? And why does it appear to be hitting us younger and younger?

Is it the food we eat? Is it the clothings we wear or the perfumes we splash on? Or is our day-to-day inactive office lifestyle making it conducive for cancer cells to grow and multiply? I wonder..

We asked the good doctor on the very day when Nellie 's cancer was declared as being in remission, the one question that had been on our minds all those 6 months through chemo:

"So how and why was it that Nellie was stricken with this cancer in the first place, Doc?"

His answer took us by surprise. Based on our best recollection, this is what he tried to tell us in the simplest terms:

He said he believes in the "seed and soil" theory. Our body is constantly exposed to cancer-causing stuffs called carcinogens.. things we eat, stuff we breathe. But our body's immune system battles against these carcinogens and wins. Almost always. But there comes a time when our body's natural immune system meets with a cancer-causing agent but fails to wipe it out and flush it off our body. This one abnormal cell starts to multiply and therein lies the beginnings of a cancer growth.

So what caused the body's immune system to fail us, we asked? His answer.. stress!
Stress from everyday life.. from work, from family, from relationships. Therein lies his "seed and soil" theory. The seed (cancer-causing agent) happens to sit on the soil (an organ in our body) at the very moment when the soil was 'weakened', so to speak, by stress.

Does this makes sense? We looked into Nellie's past. She's a relatively active lady, meaning she works out in the gym at least once a week, jogs when she can and plays golf perhaps twice a month. As recent as last August, she took her regular healthscreening test and all seemed fine. But taking another deeper look, we realised that she was indeed subjected to some serious stressful situations, both at work and within the family.

We can only look back and connect some dots. But can it be true what the doc said .. that stress could be the big culprit afterall? Till today, we look back and wonder... perhaps the smart thing to do is to make a vow to not let any stress bring us depressingly down from here on. With the benefit of hindsight, this makes perfect sense to us, and we hope it gives you something to think about too, for health's sake.

And please, do listen to your body and if something is not normal, go and have it checked early! As I write this, the results of my sister's report was told to me.. she's in Stage 1. Her surgeon added.." it's a good thing your sister came to us early". Thank God, indeed.

>>gleefully ntangle

The Mind-Body connection

Try listening to these words..

" Take a comfortable position and let yourself begin to relax in your own way. Let your breathing get a little deeper and fuller but still comfortable. With every breath in, notice that you bring in fresh air. Fresh oxygen that fills your body. And with every breath out, imagine that you can release a little bit of tension. A bit of discomfort. A bit of worry. And let that deeper breathing and the thought you have for fresh energy in and tension and worry out, be an invitation to your body and mind to begin to relax.

And let it be an easy and natural movement, without having to force anything, without having to make anything happen right now. Just letting it happen. Just breathing and relaxing.. breathing and energising.."

Do they not simply melt your body and relax you?

Those are the words from a CD called "Complementary Cancer with Evidence-based Mind-Body Medicine", compiled by Dr Lim Kok Kwang and Ms Wong Mei Yin. With title tracks such as "Relax to Free Yourself from Stress", "Get the Best of Chemotherapy" and "Create Inner Strength and Courage", the listener is brought through various imageries through the mind. The goal? To use the mind as a key tool in bolstering your body's strength, therefore enhancing your immune system.

We came across an article on this subject in an April issue of the Straits Times 'Health' Supplement, and immediately went to get a copy of the CD. Indeed, it turned out to be one of the best investment for Nellie's fight against her cancer. We can't quantify the return on this "investment" of $15 but I know that it brings a sense of calm in Nellie's face everytime she listens to any one of the 5 tracks.

The CD was available from Shan You Counselling Centre, Blk 5 Upper Boon Keng Rd, #02-15, Singapore 380005. Tel: (65) 6741 9293.

I have no doubt that the mind is a wonderful tool. Keeping it positive everytime, keeping it nimble in the heat of the side-effects of chemotherapy.. I know that has been a hallmark of Nellie's. She even went back to cross-stitching to keep her mind challenged and alert. For someone like me who thought cross-stitched works that one buys at the shops are easily stitched replicas, put together by mass labour in a faraway country, well, lets just say it was a huge eye-opener for me. After a span of 3 months of concentrated work, though intermittent, she completed a beautifully stitched piece of art.. 18 bright roses resting in a delicately weaved basket.

The framed art-piece now hangs at our doorway, forever reminding us of the beauty of combining courage and patience.. both seemingly abundant in this homegrown cross-stitcher.

>>gleefully ntangle